Up until some years ago, I wouldn't be caught dead dancing in front of anyone. If there was a beat worth moving to, the biggest expression you'd get from me was the bobbing head. Most of my dancing and stepping (with the exception of a few times dancing with family at the tender ages of 5 and 6) was relegated to my bedroom, where I could move as freely and crazily as wanted to without fear of what people would think.
And that's been my issue for pretty much anything that deals with being expressed in front of an audience: fear of what people would think.
First time I danced with anyone was in high school, and I was so self conscious (sp?) that I thought everyone was looking at me. This caused me to stay away from public dancing for a few more years. I slowly let loose a bit, finally feeling comfy enough to go up and dance with family in groups....yet still feeling as if people would critique my every step and move.
I'd say my turning (or should I say "twirling" ) point was at a cousin's wedding a few years back , when an upbeat, made-for-dancing latin song came out. I loved that song, and was a bit envious when I saw all these happy-go-lucky people hitting the dance floor to enjoy it. I began doing the old head bobbing...but with that head bobbing came some foot tapping and a bit of shoulder action....
And then I got caught in the act....yes, people caught me in the act of moving to the music. I froze. I became flushed...with thoughts again of what "they" will think of me.But instead of getting made fun of and laughed at, "they" smiled and extended arms to join them. Of course, I hesitated...but wow, the beat was too powerful to resist. So, I joined them...moving to the latin rhythms while laughing and having a good time...with the fears and embarassment soon fading away.
These days, I don't hesitate all that much when I comes to dancing when I want to. Last night at my aunt and uncle's 25th anniversary celebration, I felt the 80s beat, so I danced to "The Cure" and the like; I felt the latin music taking hold, so there I went trying to keep up with the rhythm; the hip hop songs had me feeling funky, so I moved around to those; I even danced to some of the cheesy music.
This wasn't a result from me being a better dancer... a Ginger Rogers I'm not. It had more to do with me being more comfortable in my own skin...something, of course, that has helped in other parts of my life besides dancing.
My next dancing endeavors: tackling the "born to boogie" country song that's a big hit at any wedding or party around here (it intimidates me!)....and giving ballroom dancing a try.